032 | Live Lead Launch Webinar with Meredith Rom

 

Last week I led a webinar all about how to Live, Lead and Launch as a Rising Woman Leader. 

Many of you signed up to watch the webinar but the replay was only available for a couple days afterwards and some of you have reached out to share you weren't able to watch it in that limited time. So I really sat and thought about it, and I decided to make this webinar available for you as an audio on the Rising Women Leaders podcast.

I received such positive feedback from the women who took the time to listen that I knew I wanted this information to be available to as many women as possible.

I spent so much time gathering and putting all this valuable content together in one place for you to rise as the woman and leader you know you are… so here it is now available for free for you to listen to.

Just to note: this webinar was led live over video, so there are some parts where I am doing a screen share to show you the web page of my latest course, and you can actually find all the details about that at risingwomenleaders.com. 

There are some prompts I give throughout the episode so it would be great if you had a pen and paper to write down some of the ideas and insights that come to you.

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • More about my story and why I believe it’s important for women to be sharing their gifts and their voices in the world 
  • Solutions to have more courage, share your voice, to lead with femininity ease and grace
  • The 5 mistakes I made when I launched my very first online offering and how you can avoid them
  • My 6 truths about fear and how to move through fear and self-doubt when it inevitably will arise as a feminine leader
  • The 4-step implementation process I use to design and launch successful online courses
  • All about my new offering Live, Lead and Launch that begins June 7th and includes 4 live calls for you to learn all the tools and systems you need to launch your dream online course...

Enrollment is now open until June 6th. Join us right here.

I believe the time is here for you:

To rise as the woman and leader you know you are

To stand up and share your gifts

To be spiritually AND financially empowered.

To thrive in your life's work AND do what you LOVE everyday.

To do it all in while embracing a feminine way of being and living: 

From the comfort of your own home.

On your own schedule.

From anywhere in the world… 

I hope you enjoy today’s show. 

Love, 
Meredith

 

Why I Didn't Take on New Work This Winter

 

The idea for my Live, Lead, Launch webinar came to me about 6 months ago, but I didn't take action on it.

That's because this winter I was deep in hibernation mode. I had just raised over $10k to publish my book, Just Be and the thought of launching anything or increasing my visibility felt like way too much.

What I really needed was rest. So besides continuing with a few coaching clients, taking small steps forward with my book and teaching a weekly yoga class, rest is what I did.

I gifted myself the time of deep rest and spiritual inquiry.

I took long walks with my cat in the back field. I meditated. I read books. I took naps on my couch.

And to be honest, part of me felt guilty about it. Part of me wondered what was happening to me. Was I losing my creative drive and ambition? Was I becoming a different person? Where was my usual zest for life? I began questioning everything.

I also compared myself to other women making huge strides in their career. I felt left behind. The voices in my head started telling me, "You should be doing more! You should be earning more! You should be serving more!"

In the past, I've listened to those voices, and you know what?

I burned out. I've been in that place where I drove myself to stay up late on the computer night after night and sacrifice my self-care. It was terrible.

I have recently vowed not to push myself like that anymore.

Only within the last few weeks have I felt myself waking up from winter's hibernation. I realize now, I wasn't losing myself.

I was finding myself. The wisdom of my body was guiding me closer to the feminine.

Honoring a feminine way of being and living is cyclical. It goes through phases of contraction and expansion.

Think of a woman giving birth. There are times of intensity, and then there are periods of rest. It's honoring that there is a universal force moving through you, and you have to trust in the process. You can't make it happen any faster than how it is naturally meant to unfold.

So I've been focusing my energy on one project at a time. I consistently ask myself:

Where do I invest my energy to make my highest contribution?

I have more trust in the natural rhythms and cycles of being a woman. I know it's okay if I go through periods of great expansion and periods of deep rest. I trust in the divine timing of when a project is ready to be birthed.

And after many months of incubation, my latest project, Live Lead Launch is ready for you.

If this way of living and being appeals to you, I'll be sharing more about it in my free webinar tomorrow.

Just click here to sign up if you haven't already. We go live tomorrow at 12 pm PDT.

In this webinar you'll learn:

  • How I went from $5/student as a yoga teacher to 5-figure months as an online entrepreneur
  • A system to design successful online courses (as well as mistakes I have made along the way)
  • How to address fears and doubts of becoming a leader and teacher
  • How to embrace a feminine way of being and living to avoid burnout when running a business

Even if you can't make it live, when you click here and sign up you'll be sent the replay while it's available.

And if you've been feeling the call to rise as a feminine leader, I know you probably have a deep calling to birth something into the world...

Today, I invite you to trust that it's happening. My hope is this free webinar will give you the tools you need to take your next steps while honoring the feminine in the process.

With love,

Meredith

 

How I Went From $5/Student as a Yoga Teacher to My First 5-Figure Month as an Online Entrepreneur

 

Today I want to talk to you about a topic that has been on my mind lately: Money.

I've been having conversations with women who are doing amazing work in the world yet are struggling to really make the impact they want to make in the world AND be able to financially support themselves, let alone live in a state of abundance and prosperity.

Some of you may remember several years ago when I led a teleclass series called Financial Alchemy. At that time, I was determined to shift my relationship to money.

I dove into reading numerous books, started a retirement account (which I've invested in every year since I was 26), set up all my systems for my business including quickbooks for tracking income and expenses, hired a fiduciary to talk about my investments, and hired an accountant to learn the best practices for my business.

Yet there was one piece I hadn't quite figured out - how to bring in the amount of income I really needed through doing what I loved.

I was starting out as a new yoga teacher in a town, and I had just finished my coaching certification, but it still felt like a struggle to make ends meet.

I knew I had big gifts to share with the world, but I didn't know where to start. Not to mention, when I did start, I was filled with fear and self-doubt around stepping up to teach, lead and share my voice.

So I did the best I could, working for little pay to gain experience because I knew this work was my calling, it was what I was here to do. I supplemented my income with side jobs, and in the meantime I prayed to find a way to reach the people I was here to serve.

I longed to fully share my gifts, to release my fears of being a teacher and to live and give at my fullest potential and maybe, just maybe, to find a way for it all to be easy.

I desired to let go of a masculine business model of pushing and forcing and instead honor a feminine way of being and living - to have a flexible schedule, the ability to work from anywhere, and live with prosperity through work that got me excited to get out of bed in the morning!

Around this time, I began creating 40-day meditation practices where I would read a vision I wrote for my life and for the world, out loud, everyday.

Then, one day it dawned on me. Other women may want to learn how to do this too! Maybe even women all over the world!

In that moment, the seed for my first online course was planted.

After much trial and error, a beta test, and more online marketing training under my belt, I launched my first online course, Vision.

It was the culmination of all I had learned about self-love, self-care, meditation, manifestation, ritual, wellness and lifestyle design.

I did my research and prep work, then I launched.

To my surprise, 26 women in countries around the world signed up.

I remember in the last few days of that launch, the signups kept coming in, and I didn't know what to do because I had only prepared myself to teach to 15 women!

But I reminded myself that the universe was only going to give me the opportunity to do what I was ready for. And I had prayed to serve and share my gifts at their highest potential. Here was my opportunity.

With the income I earned from my first online course along with the income I had secured through teaching yoga and serving one-on-one clients that month I had brought in $10,000 in two weeks.

Now, this was coming from someone who was used to earning $5 per student teaching at a yoga studio, and for several months prior I had to dip into savings just to pay my rent.

For the first time I saw that I was capable of doing what I loved, and earning good money from it! I saw I didn't need to rely on others, but rather be financially and spiritually empowered to continue doing the work I loved.

Launching that first course literally changed my life and overturned my whole perspective of what I thought was possible.

The side jobs I was holding on to quickly became a part of the past and I fully immersed myself into my life's work.

Since then, I've gone on to lead Vision several more times and have guided many others in developing their own online offerings to fully LAUNCH their life's work into the world.

(In addition to Vision, I used the same principles to fill my first international retreat in Bali, Indonesia and sell almost 200 copies of my book before it was even released...)

I've spent the last three years refining these principles and now for the first time, I'm sharing them with you..

Next week I'll be leading a webinar on May 24th at 12 pm PDT for you to Live, Lead & Launch your dreams!

Join us here

In this webinar, you'll learn tools to:

  • Share Your Gifts as a Teacher and Leader To Reach People Everywhere in the World
  • Refine Your Big Ideas into Your Ideal Offering: Use the Same Principles
  • to Design Your Online Course, Program, or In-Person Retreat
  • Be Spiritually + FINANCIALLY Empowered Doing What You Love
  • Contribute to the Vision You Wish to See in the World
  • :: All With Femininity, Ease & Grace ::

I look forward to sharing more with you next week...

With love, 
Meredith

P.S. Even if you can't make it live, you'll be sent the replay to the webinar when you sign up right here.

 

The Cover of My Book (+ Tips on Birthing Your Big Dream)

REAL TALK: it's taken me six years to publish my first book.

I remember the exact spot I was in India on Mount Arunachala, the holy mountain of stillness and light, in spring 2011 right after my friend told me he thought I would write a book one day.

I sat pondering, "What would I write a book about? What would I have to say?"

At first I brushed off the idea, feeling like it would all just be too hard, but soon I imagined opening pages of the book, and saw each chapter title as a mantra, where I shared stories from my travels in India.

I imagined the words speaking of love and breakups, and the journey I set out on to find love within rather than outside of myself.

I imagined the book would speak of the sages and saints I met on my path and would bring light to the spiritual teachings that have been life-changing for me.

Then I thought, "That's not such a bad idea! Maybe I should write a book..."

Fast forward six years and I am in the final three months before my book, Just Be: A Search for Self-Love in India is released to the world.

Many of you have been following me on this journey from the Kickstarter campaign to the title change (read more about that here), to the new cover design and beyond.

But I know for many of you, this may be the first time hearing about this project.

So today I wanted to share with you the final cover design.

It will be a complete 9-month journey from when I began work with my publisher last December to when my book is released at the end of August.

And in many ways it has felt like birthing a child.

I've had to do deep spiritual work in moving through fears and doubts, as well as releasing expectations and attachments to the final outcome.

There were many, many times I almost gave up. But somehow, I kept going.

I can imagine that if you have a big dream you have been wanting to birth into the world, you have been facing some of these doubts and challenges that naturally come up along the way.

I invite you to reconnect to your intention in birthing that dream - what do you hope to gain from it?

Throughout the whole book-birthing process I reminded myself of 3 simple intentions:

  • I desire to learn about how to write and publish a book
  • I long to honor this divinely guided idea (that felt like it chose me and asked me to birth it)
  • I hope to help even just 1 person through the stories and teachings that are shared in it

When I reconnected to these intentions again and again, it always felt so much easier to take the next step.

So, what dream are you holding in your heart that you are ready to birth into the world? If you feel called to share with us, let us know in the comments below.

And you know what? It's totally OKAY if it takes YEARS longer than you ever thought it would to birth your dream...

I am cheering you on from the sidelines because from my experience, I can tell you it feels pretty awesome when you finally get there.

With love, 
Meredith

031 | Cultivating Spirit Flow with Mari Sierra

 

I love when I see a woman merge her love of design with spirituality in her business. Today I'd like to introduce you to one of these women, Mari Sierra. 

I first met Mari at Erica Jago's yoga retreat in Yosemite. Mari led us through a Five Rhythms dance practice as well as a workshop to connect to our five senses. At the time, she was newly married and spent much of her time working with start up companies in San Francisco. 

Flash forward a couple years, and Mari has now led several of her own retreats around the world, moved back where she grew up in Mexico, left a partnership that was no longer serving her or her husband and has studied for several months at a dance intensive in Berlin. 

What changed? How did she make a leap to follow her heart, even when she knew it may take her to unknown and unexpected places?

In this episode Mari shares:

  • Her story of leaving her marriage and business to follow her heart and become a nomad
  • Her experience of dance and how she uses it to cultivate a deeper state of spirit flow
  • The intention behind La Mar, her yoga retreat created with Erica Jago
  • Second and third chakra studies - How to tap into your sensuality, creativity and will power
  • Archetypes and the future female - how we can use female archetypes to learn more about ourselves
  • How she overcomes her fears
  • Rituals and practices to connect to self, sensuality, and the earth
  • The upcoming LA MAR yoga retreat in Sayulita, Mexico!

Links in this episode:

Mari Sierra is a curious explorer of the mind-body connection and our collective evolution. She designs learning experiences for groups around the world, to explore the depths of the creative mind through yoga, meditation, dance, ritual, mysticism and self-expression. Her passion is to inspire people to inquire within, to open sensitivity to the subtle energy body, with nature elements and the principle of interconnectedness. Originally from Mexico city, she experimented with a myriad of dance schools, shamanic and yogic practices, then moved to San Francisco to work in design and social innovation, where she facilitates creative sessions with technology companies, coaches, and visionary leaders to find the song of their hearts and realign their work with higher intentions. 

 

030 | Open Your Voice with Songs from Singing Alive Kauai

 

This month I took myself on a trip to Kauai to attend a gathering called Singing Alive Kauai.  I felt the call to go after spending days with my grandmother in the hospital as she was passing. I found song to be such a soothing and sacred way to connect with her during that difficult time and I wanted to immerse myself in an environment of song in the weeks after she passed.

On one afternoon I experienced a surreal moment when the women gathered to all sing together.  After anchoring and opening the space, our facilitator invited any woman to teach a song to us. The first woman to stand up called in a sister in spirit - hundreds of miles away - one of my dearest friends for the past four years, Mackenzie Myers.

She then led us in call and response to sing one of Mackenzies songs, a song I have heard my friend sing many times. In that moment my skin was covered with goosebumps and tears streamed down my face because of what a powerful song it is. I was thinking about my friend, who only a few years ago was holding fear around stepping up to share her voice.

In that moment her song was reaching the ears and voices of fifty or sixty women, and it truly unified us together and opened our hearts. 

It is moments like these that remind me why it is so important for women to face their fears and share their gifts, especially their voice. 

The song that my friend Mackenzie had written was pure medicine for all the women in our circle. I felt so proud of her for facing her fears and sharing her voice so her songs could spread and be experienced by more and more people.

In today's podcast episode I share Mackenzie's song from our women's circle as well as three more powerful songs for you to sing along to.

My hope is they create a safe and nurturing space for YOU to open up and share your voice.

With love, 
Meredith

P.S. Check out the full song "Remember" by Faye Adinda (the I love and accept myself song in this episode) right here.

 

029 | God, Love, Sobriety & Finding Your Voice with Adriana Rizzolo

 

Have you ever gone on a trip to come back feeling like everything in your life just feels messy? I just came back from a trip to Kauai last week where I got to see dear friend Adriana Rizzolo, the featured guest on our podcast today.

Even though my inbox has been full, and I am bursting with so many creative ideas that it's hard to know where to start, I'm learning to love the mess. To love everything that's arising. To be okay with everything just as it is.

And this is something I love about Adriana - she carries herself with so much love and respect, no matter what the circumstances. 

In the episode Adriana shares about some pretty difficult hardships she's faced, including her story of healing from addiction and what happened when she lost everything she owned when her car was stolen.

So today, i invite you to breathe a little deeper, trust in the unfolding and love yourself (and your life exactly as it is) even if it sometimes all feels like a big mess...

In this episode you'll learn:

  • Adriana's story of addiction and sobriety and what role yoga and meditation played in her healing journey
  • How losing all her belongings and having her car stolen ended up as a divine intervention
  • Tips Adriana has for women who are finding their voice 
  • The role kirtan and chanting has played in her life
  • Adriana's thoughts on facing fears and stepping into a more loving and courageous life

“Often what I find underneath my fear is a genuine desire, and that’s okay.” 

With love, 
Meredith


Adriana is an intuitive healer, yoga and meditation teacher, kirtan and voice guide, spiritual mentor, reiki master, hair stylist, writer and creative wild woman. Her passion is in helping others connect to the wild sacredness of their bodies, tender hearts, pelvic wisdom, authentic voices, and to their immense healing power of love. She helps others find their unique fire and build a strong connection to Spirit. She supports specifically in healing addiction and anxiety. She has studies extensively in India and with David Harshada Wagner and Living Meditation. She loves to nurture community, intimacy and connection to Spirit in a fun, powerful and practical way. Adriana trains individuals and leads sacred circles in New York City , Los Angeles and everywhere online. To find out more visit www.adrianarizzolo.com or on instagram @artofloving

 

028 | Luna Love on the Muse, Creative Entrepreneurship & Inner Marriage

 

Some of you may remember Luna Love from an episode where she interviewed me for her show - The Ladies Who Lead Podcast - where I shared my 4 Keys to Feminine Leadership. 

I invited Luna on RWL to share about creative entrepreneurship, how she uses the muse to go for her dreams and about the process of inner marriage - how she came into wholeness and attracted a loving partnership in her life.

One of the things I admire about this woman is her ability to accomplish so much, WHILE  nurturing a feminine way of being and living - one of the values I hold so dear in my own business. In this episode she shares some of her secrets to "getting it all done" while creating space for what matters most.

“Our capacity to receive as women is really not about other people giving us things but about our willingness to receive our unlimited potential and through the receptivity of that greatness lies the energy to create more and be of greater service…”
~ Luna Love

In this episode Luna shares about:

  • The “I can” vs. “I can’t” voice and how she came to be a women’s leadership mentor
  • How to decipher and tune into intuition
  • Tips on how we can find our purpose
  • Creativity and the muse - what it is and how to use it to go after your dreams
  • Luna’s secret to “getting it all done!”
  • Inner marriage, personal responsibility and the list you need to write if you want to call in and attract a loving partnership
  • The relationship tool Luna uses to use to cut through illusion and deepen connection
  • Luna’s take on when it’s time to “feel the fear and do it anyway” and how to go about it

Enjoy!

Love, 
Meredith

Luna is a Women’s Leadership Mentor, assisting those called to be change-makers in the world, in achieving clear vision for their lives by providing supportive, life-promoting experiences, practical tools and spiritual wisdom to align one’s divine essence, authentic expression and life-purpose. She creates transformative experiences for her clients through the power of self-awareness and self-love.

Luna facilitates online courses, group coaching, workshops, immersion programs and retreats to support her clients in devoting themselves to themselves, and serving the world from that place. Additionally she works as a counselor at a leading holistic drug and alcohol rehabilitation center and writes for numerous online publications. Most of all Luna is devoted to walking her path in the beauty way.

 

You're Invited to a Nourishing Spring Retreat

 
leaves-yoga-meditation-spring-retreat

When I feel agitated, frustrated, have pain in my body, or am experiencing difficult emotions, I show up to my yoga mat.

That is when I receive all my best insights.

That is where I am able to tap back into what's really important, make decisions about my business, and receive guidance when I feel at a loss at what to do.

I believe our body is full with wisdom.

We all have a 'highest self' inside who knows the answers.  However,  we can only access this wisdom when our mind is quiet enough to tune into intuition.

It's so important to listen to what our body is telling us, but often we get distracted.  To-do lists, obligations, work, kids, and a busy mind can crowd out the wise-self we all have inside.

That's why Karen Prosen and I decided to devote a whole day to help those ready to tap back into this wisdom.

We want you to reconnect to that wise, centered part of yourself.  The part of yourself that already knows all the answers. 

We also want to honor and welcome the new season of spring.  This is a time to start fresh and release old patterns that are no longer serving us. This is a time to step into a new way of being and living in the world.

We have rented a gorgeous yurt in Occidental, CA for a one-day retreat in honor of our body's wisdom and the new season on Saturday, April 1, 2017 from 10 am - 5 pm.

We are creating an intentional space for an intimate group.  I'll be teaching gentle yoga, breathing and voice exercises.

Karen will lead us through meditation and yoga nidra to recede into rest and we will end the day in celebration with kirtan chanting.

For lunch, we have invited Camina Gillotti to prepare an ayurvedic lunch with locally harvested foods.

If you are in need of nourishment, of rest, of community and reconnection to your body's wisdom, I invite you to join us.

The investment is $108 when reserved by March 18, or $188 when you reserve for two.

You can read more about the day and reserve your space here.

And if you're unavailable, or don't live locally, please take a moment to ask yourself, "Do I know anyone in the Bay Area in need of this kind of nourishment?"  I invite you to forward this message to him or her.

In love and service, Meredith (and Karen) <3

 

027 | Medicine For Your Spirit with Vyana Ma

 

Today we are lucky to receive a transmission from Vyana Ma on the Rising Women Leaders Podcast. Vyana is another soul sister I first met through the world of instagram where we soon connected, met in person, and I learned of her work as an energy medicine teacher, devotee, musician and activist. 

I sat down to speak with her a couple months ago for the podcast when she had just come back from a bhakti yoga immersion in Mexico and was making a plan to travel to Standing Rock.  

I re-listened to this episode on my birthday in the bathtub and as soon as I heard her soothing voice, I knew there was no where else I would rather be. Her words brought me right back to my truth, reminding me of the power of being, loving and giving to ourselves in order to give back as teachers and healers, and the profound impact forgiveness can have on our lives. 

Re-listening to her story of healing from childhood abuse to become such a compassionate and strong woman leader helps me remember what I know in the core of my being - that really, anything is possible. 

"Humility and gratitude give us the freedom to experience the divinity that we are."

"...And if we always return to these principles of being and humbling ourselves and being grateful for what we have we will never be lost, no matter how confusing or painful it may feel. When we come back to humility and gratitude we will always find our way." ~Vyana Ma

In this episode you’ll learn about:

  • When to listen to the inner call - letting go of what “makes sense” to the rational mind in order to follow the heart
  • Vyana’s travels through Mexico and beyond
  • Her story of finding balance between giving and receiving as a healer and teacher
  • Her sadhana practice and experience with the Gayatri Mantra 
  • How she moves through resistance to spiritual practice 
  • Vyana’s story of awakening, rising above and healing childhood abuse to heal herself and others
  • Vyana's story of sharing her voice as a singer and teacher
  • Her experience of opening the portal to become a mother 
  • How we can open to forgiveness and the difference between 'letting go' and 'letting live'

Links in this episode:


Vyana Ma is a woman who lives on the earth and breathes the air. 

She is also an international energy medicine teacher & speaker based out of Ojai, Ca. She blends her journey through childhood sexual & physical abuse, addiction, and self abuse with trainings in Eastern & Western healing modalities. Using these tools, Vyana guides her clients & students through the shadowed and disempowered aspects of themselves to reach a place of trust and truth.

 

Is Patience Really A Virtue?

 

I am the kind of woman who likes to get stuff done. When I have an idea, I sprint into action. But when my idea doesn't manifest as my reality right away, I often get frustrated and upset.

Recently I saw this attitude permeating all areas of my life.  I found myself asking questions like, "Why isn't my business growing faster than this?" "When will I ever be able to buy a house of my own?" and "Will I ever get married?" 

Sound familiar?

Then I was invited to a friend's house for a meditation. I did the best I could to stay present with my breath through the hour we practiced, but often found my mind wandering into the future.  Thoughts like,"Should my next blog post be about self-care or relationships?" "How do you know when it's time to hire a virtual assistant?"  and "Would I have reliable wifi if I lived in Bali?" crossed my mind.

At the end of the practice, my friend pulled a book off the shelf, opened to a random page and read a dharma teaching aloud to us.  He said:

There once was an old man who was very devoted to his guru. He had been meditating for over twenty years and just knew it wouldn't be long before he became enlightened. He went to his guru and asked, "How much longer until I become enlightened?" 

The guru looked at him and said, "It will take you three more lifetimes." 

"Three more lifetimes!" the old man exclaimed. "That is ridiculous!  I have been working so hard, meditating for twenty years, and it is going to take me three more lifetimes! I can't believe this!" 

He stomped his feet and left.

Then, a young boy who was watching nearby came over. He went to the guru and asked, "How many lifetimes until I become enlightened?" 

The guru looked up at a nearby tree and said, "It will take you as many lifetimes as there are leaves on that tree." 

The boy looked up at the tree and gasped when he saw there must have been hundreds of leaves on it.

He took a deep breath and replied, "I'm so glad to know that I will become enlightened. I can surely count how many leaves are on that tree. That means, one day, I really will become enlightened!"

He was simply in the joy and eagerness of receiving what he wanted, without being attached to it.

The boy left and the story goes, that very day he became enlightened. Because he was willing to wait and be patient, all was granted to him.

I thought about this and realized when we get what we want, we are usually excited for a little bit of time, but soon there is emptiness.  Shortly after, a new desire arises and takes the place of the old one.

I wondered, What if the joy in life is actually in the waiting, rather than the getting of what we want? What if the best part about getting what we want is the anticipation itself?

If we are willing to be in the process, to fully be present there and to be in our growth, there will be joy.

And when we are willing to be present and find joy in the process, it will be easy. There won't be  a struggle because we're not trying to skip steps and jump further ahead than where we really are.

I saw that the struggles I had recently faced were happening because I was pushing before I was ready. I didn't trust in the process. And with this new knowledge, I knew I could be patient. If you are willing to be patient in the joy of waiting, you might even get what you want right away.

 

Seven Signs You're a Modern Day Priestess

 

When I was growing up and heard the word "priestess," I thought of boring sermons at church, wearing clothes I didn't feel comfortable in and being forced to sit quietly when I wanted to play outside. I didn't know much about what it meant to be a priestess other than it was probably the female version of a "priest."

As a playful young girl, the thought of becoming a female priest sounded pretty mundane.

Then one day, a friend wrote out my numerology. It was the number eleven, which also breaks down to two. In tarot, the eleven (or two) corresponds to the archetype of the High Priestess. She told me in ancient times, the priestess was known for having a heightened contact to other realms through intuition and dreams. The community would seek counsel from priestesses to know what actions to take in their lives.

I thought about my life and how I had always had a heightened sense of intuition; of being able to feel into a situation in order to make a decision. I thought of how friends were naturally drawn to me for guidance and consolation during difficult times.

Maybe I was a priestess after all.

Over a few months, I felt more and more connected to the archetype of the High Priestess and dove into books and articles on the topic. I began to see: the modern day priestess lives anything but a mundane life. Her life is rich in dreams, intuition, ritual, feminine leadership and a connection to the divine.

Here are seven signs there is a modern day priestess awakening within you:

Your Calling is to be of Service

To be a leader, you must first learn to serve. —Jennie Mira

The priestess is not a teacher or leader on a pedestal, but rather, she is of the highest service.  She is in service to her community and to her calling.  Being of service is not about placing anyone above or below, but rather creating a mutual relationship of respect between the priestess and the women she facilitates and serves.

Her work is to become a channel, a vessel to serve the highest good of the divine.  She must maintain a practice of self-care to be the most present and abundant in her ability to serve and become a channel.

Many women fantasize about a priestess wearing flowing robes, crowns and using magical tools, but in reality the priestess must be prepared "to be the last one in the rented hall, scraping candle wax droppings with a razor blade."  ~ Ruth Barrett

You are Highly Intuitive

The priestess uses practices such as writing, dancing, movement, meditation, self-care and alone time to hone her ability to listen to intuition. Our intuition is like a muscle that heightens when we pay attention to it. The more she can quiet the busyness of her mind, the more access she will have to the guidance of the divine and be able to step into the role of a channel to those in need.

You Seek Out Ritual in Your Daily Life

Rituals infuse magic, intention and sacredness into our daily lives. A ritual can turn a mundane act done without awareness into a sacred act with clarity and purpose. Slowing down to say a blessing before a meal changes the experience. Meditation, singing, or lighting a candle imbues a moment of peace and serenity into a busy day.

Ritual can also be a healing space where women come together to honor a specific purpose. These rituals may honor transitions, letting go, grieving, the lunar cycle or the change of seasons. Participating in ritual has been one of the most healing ways to mark a big transition in my life. Ritual has provided a space for me to be fully seen, acknowledged and supported by my sisters. After participating in ritual, I feel more confident and courageous to share myself with the world.

Your Internal Clock is Synced with the Moon

In ancient times, women slept in tribes, often under the stars and the moon. Their menstrual cycles were in sync with each other and with the lunar cycles: bleeding at the new moon and ovulating at the full moon.

You may begin to be more in tune to the natural world and notice energy levels rise and fall. Going out to socialize will make more sense with the heightened energy of the full moon and slowing down to nest will feel perfect at the new moon. For a modern day priestess, creativity, energy levels and social needs begin to flow in tandem with the moon and tides.

You Are Highly Sensitive

A priestess can feel the energies of the room and has a heightened ability to feel other people's emotions. This can be difficult for highly sensitive women because the world may sometimes feel like "too much."

In my last program, one of the woman "came out" as an HSP (highly sensitive person) and nearly all the others spoke up to share how much they related to and supported her. As a highly sensitive person, you may feel alone in a world of extroverted and gregarious people, however we often forget that heightened sensitivity is a gift.  You can fuel your feelings and emotions into writing, singing, and listening with a deeper level of compassion for others.

You Have Prophetic Dreams

Have you ever dreamt something and realized it became your reality a week later? A priestess often turns to her dreams for guidance. Dreams are a powerful place to explore questions in your life and to connect to the desires of your subconscious self.

One practice I use often is re-entering dreams. When you are unsure of how to decipher the symbols or occurrences of a dream, close your eyes and imagine yourself back in the space. Then go to characters and objects one at a time and ask, "What do you have to show me?" You will probably be surprised with the answers your subconscious comes up with.

You Are Naturally Drawn to Holding Space

The twenty-first century priestess becomes the container who helps create sacred space wherein women can connect with the Goddess within. —Ruth Barrett

A priestess is a space-holder. She creates the space for others to show up as they are. Have you noticed that people turn to you to guide them through an experience? Holding space is not about planning or knowing what to do or say. It is about becoming present to the moment. All that is needed is to tune into the energy of the person or the group; to listen and ask for guidance within.

In the comments, I'd love to hear what a "priestess" means to you and how can you embody the priestess in your daily life?

 

Are Your Desires Making You Miserable?

 


Lately I've been thinking a lot about the difference between desire and attachment...

When I was on a ten day silent meditation retreat over the holidays, I began to see how my mind would obsess over the same desires over and over again. (Mostly about achieving more, doing more, having more...)

It became crystal clear that those desires - that had once been born out of pure innocence - had become attachments and they were causing me suffering. 

In a moment of realization in meditation, on Christmas Day, when I had been feeling quite a lot of pain in my body, I broke down in tears, realizing I had been creating the cause of my own suffering by focusing so much on what I didn't have, and what was not in my present moment reality.

So I did what I could to clear those attachments away. I focused on what was happening in my body and breath and released the need for anything to be different than it already was.

An image flashed in my mind of myself being completely stripped down to simple clothes and a shaved head, meditating - settling into a state of stillness and total presence. 

From this state of complete patience, self-lessness and letting go, a ground zero of sorts, I asked myself what was really important to me - and the answer was so simple: time in beautiful natural environments with my beloved, singing and being a teacher and mentor, walks in the back field with my cat, Quan Yin, and going out to dinner with friends. That was it... 

From that day forward in the retreat, meditation became so much easier. Pain began to lift on my body, and in the times when it came back, my relationship to it was completely different. I had developed a patience that hadn't been there before. I allowed the sensations to be there, the thoughts to be there, witnessing, knowing at some point they would pass, and they always did. 

Carrying these insights into my life, I've found a state of more ease and gentleness.

But what about our desires? Isn't it good to have goals and ambitions? I think it is good to have desires, goals and ambitions, but when we find ourselves suffering from those desires, it's time to ask if we have become attached.

It has been a great relief for me to enjoy life (and all that I already have) from a place of nonattachment - allowing everything to just be as it is.

I can't say I've figured it all out, and sometimes those old attachments linger back into my mind, but that's when I come back to my meditation practice, noticing the sensations and breath, and remembering all that is real and perfect in this moment.

To hear more about this topic, listen to my latest podcast where I share the introduction of my book due to release this summer. If you missed my last email, you'll hear all about the new title, Just Be: A Search for Self-Love in India. And, if this message resonates with you, I'd love to hear in the comments.

With love, 
 Meredith

 

026 | Announcing a New Title for My Book + A Bonus Reading

 
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I wanted to share an update on what's happening with the book I wrote of my travels in India! After raising over ten thousand dollars in the Kickstarter campaign last Fall to publish it, I got right to work with my publishing team.  

Right now the manuscript is being copyedited, the official release date is August 22, 2017 and Kickstarter supporters should receive their early copy in July. 

After much contemplation, research, and discussion with my publishing team and kickstarter supporters, I have decided to change the title of my book from Synchronicity to Just Be: A Search for Self-love in India.

After my publisher approached me with the suggestion to find a title that was more direct, short, and to the point…something that would immediately speak to what the reader would be able to take away from reading this book, I began to tune into the total stillness and wisdom of my heart and asked the universe to send me a sign. (To hear the full story and hear the introduction of the book, listen to today's podcast episode)

When I was asked to "look at where my attachments lay" and make a decision that was best for the book I laughed to myself, because literally the last sentence I had written in my book was, "If I was able to release my attachments to the outcome, I knew everything would fall into place…"

Soon after, I found myself recording a podcast interview with Achintya Devi, an amazing woman in the world of women's spirituality and empowerment, and we began having technical difficulties - getting disconnected, coming on the line but using different links, about 15 - 20 minutes passed while we were just trying to begin the interview…

Frustrated, I found myself saying a new mantra over and over in my mind without realizing it, "Just be. Just be. Just be." Within a moment Achintya came on the line, and we recorded a powerful interview to close out the year.

Just Be happened to be one of the titles I was considering for the book, and in that moment, I knew this was the sign I was asking for.

Very little will actually change in the content of the book - I still share of synchronistic events and happenstance, but I’m seeing how synchronicity fits in as a natural side-effect when we tap into a space of “just being…”, releasing our attachments, and allowing the events of the universe to unfold magically around us…

I am feeling ever-more resonant with this new title and direction. After reading through the book last week, I saw how present the theme of “just being” is shared throughout. It just took having an outside perspective to point this out to me.

I believe the message of just being is so relevant and needed at this time - in a world so focused on achieving and doing…

This belief was affirmed to me a couple weeks ago when I received an email from one of my readers, Clare. She wrote in response to a newsletter I sent about letting go of goals and action plans for this year, and rather asking how we can bring more love, gentleness and service to every moment:

“When your email came in, I was initially afraid to open it, I was afraid that I was going to see yet another mention about New Year resolutions which would in turn make me feel shitty about the lack of my own. I had already seen plenty, and I was just about done feeling bad.

I opened your email, and it was the comforting hug that I needed, to remind me of that whisper in my heart that told me to spend more time nurturing myself, taking better care of myself.

After your email, I continued having similar signs pop up everywhere -- telling me that it's ok not to have everything figured out, and it's ok to take it slow. To JUST BE.”

I've been thinking more about what I want for the woman I wrote this book for…and I truly want her to experience what it is to just be...

...To fully accept herself as she is… And from that place of presence, self-love and acceptance… to follow her dreams and experience deep connection and synchronicity… but from a place of truly tuning in, and first finding stillness and silence, and listening to her heart.

After all of this I went into a 10-day silent meditation retreat, where I watched the busy-ness of my mind and found myself coming back again and again to this new mantra, "Just Be" and knew I was being guided to change the title.

My wish is for you to have an open heart and mind, and see how this mantra, “just be,” may come to play in your life…

This whole experience has really shown me the power of releasing my attachments. And how very often when we release those attachments, we end up with a solution that is even more in alignment. Who knew the process of publishing a book full with spiritual lessons would be so full of…spiritual lessons…? :)

What’s the latest update with the book now? We are putting final touches on a whole new cover - something that encompasses the magic and colors of India and the theme and message of just being…so stay tuned.

I’m so grateful for all of you. Thank you all for bearing witness to this journey. I hope you enjoy today's show.

With love, 

 Meredith

P.S. Congratulations to "Ksenia" and "Jokerofthenines" for winning the New Year Giveaway! I loved reading all of your podcast reviews and am so grateful for the time you took to share your stories. "Ksenia" and "Jokerofthenines" can email hello@meredithrom.com to schedule your free coaching session. If you'd still like to write a review for Rising Women Leaders please do so here.

 

025 | Astrology, Asteroids & Feminine Archetypes with Rebecca Farrar

 

"For me, astrology is about enchantment...When I am looking at someone's birth chart, I am looking at their soul's patterning. I am looking at the moment they were born and the heavens froze, and this special moment becomes someone's soul process." ~Rebecca

If you are a sensitive being like me you are probably feeling all the energies around what's happening in the news, the world and our country.

At one time or another, you've also probably turned to astrology to learn more about how what's happening in the stars reflects upon what's happening in the world, and within ourselves.

I'm happy to introduce you to Rebecca Farrar today, an astrologer who I recently interviewed for the Rising Women Leaders podcast.

In one of Rebecca's recent posts, she shared about how Uranus began a year long dance with Jupiter at the end of 2016 which will offer some astrological insight into this coming year.

"The themes of Jupiter revolve around philosophy, morality, travel, celebration, or success. In its more shadow expression it leans towards excessiveness, over-consumption, self-involvement, and hyper-morality. In relationship to Uranus it can invoke a revolutionary spirit against things that may not seem moral or non-humanitarian. (I think we have all felt this energy building since the 2016 U.S. election.)"

Today's episode will take you into the world of astrology, asteroids and feminine archetypes and how you can use them  to gain deeper insight into yourself and the world.

"Astrology tells me about their evolution as a soul, it tells me about where their challenges are, what their relational patterns are, how they can self-soothe with their emotions, how they can take care of themselves better. It gives a sense of enchantment with the self, letting you understand you are a part of this huge cosmic thing and you have an important role to play..."

There is a very specific reason you are here. Consciousness is shifting so quickly at this time and you are needed...

In this episode you'll discover:

  • What is the sun, moon and rising sign and what do they mean about yourself?
  • The magic and mystery of the witch and priestess feminine archetypes 
  • Embracing our weird & wild ways
  • How feminine archetypes show up in astrology 
  • How Rebecca uses the asteroids in her birth chart readings and how it affects our charts 
  • What to look out for in 2017 and how astrology is affecting the times we are in - calling us into social justice and revolution
  • How Rebecca uses ritual in her life to honor different times of the year and phases of the moon
  • Rebecca's journey with self-worth, facing fears, leaving a  full-time job and allowing herself to claim authority in her field and in her life

To learn more about Rebecca's birth chart readings, astro-locality readings, and to join her email list with tips and rituals for the full and new moon, visit her website, wildwitchwest.com. 


Rebecca M. Farrar, M.A. is an astro-priestess, wild woman, writer, and lover who lives in San Francisco (or Man Franpsycho as she likes to call it). She provides astrological guidance with a down-to-Earth approach utilizing her studies on the evolution of consciousness and psychology. Before coming out of the "broom" closet, she worked for more than a decade in PR and marketing and had brief forays as TV reporter, speed dating hostess, spokesmodel, yoga instructor, and world traveler. In 2013, she completed her M.A. In Philosophy at the California Institute of Integral Studies. Her thesis, titled “Stargazing: Re-enchantment Through Language,” combines philology, consciousness studies, and enchantment with the stars. (Warning: She will talk your ear off if you ask about it.) When not staring at her transits she can be found "force" cuddling her cat, posting on Instagram, or curled up with a good book. Read more on her site: www.wildwitchwest.com


Want to win a free 75-minute coaching session with our host?

Rising Women Leaders is running a New Year Giveaway between now and February 11, 2017 for a free 75-minute online coaching session with our host, Meredith Rom.

In this video call we will take the space to reflect on what you want to cultivate for the new year, how you want to show up to take care of yourself, your spiritual practice, and your service and contribution to the world.

Meredith will also answer any questions you have about starting or growing your business, branding, leading workshops, podcasting, finding your voice, or crafting and sharing your story.

To enter, write us a review on iTunes!

  • Follow  this link
  • Click the blue button on the side bar that says, "View in iTunes"
  • Click "Subscribe" under the Podcast Image then Click "Ratings and Reviews"
  • Click "Write a Review" where you can choose your rating, write your review and click "Submit"(you may be asked to login with your Apple ID)

You can also search for "Rising Women Leaders" in iTunes on your desktop or on the Podcast app on your iPhone to write a review.  

Positive reviews on iTunes will support our community to grow, thrive and reach the women who are seeking the powerful wisdom shared by the ladies featured on this show.

The winner will be announced on the podcast just after February 11! Thank you for participating, Good luck!!

 

024 | Next Level Purpose, Pleasure & Prosperity with Jillian Anderson

 

Jillian Anderson inspires us to heal our root and sacral chakras, step into a life that is truly next-level and remember that yes, maybe we can have it all. It just starts by remembering our true feminine power inside...

In this episode you'll hear about:

  • Jillian's story of having an unassisted homebirth
  • How her son is a mirror for where she is growing in her life 
  • Sacral chakra healing and what that has to do with our ability to experience pleasure and live prosperous lives
  • What we can learn from our difficult emotions like anger
  • What is spiritual wealth?
  • What is a jade egg practice and how to start one?
  • Jillian's input on the question, "Is it really possible to have it all? To be a mother, a loving partner and have a thriving business?" and how she finds her balance
  • The fear Jillian has faced this year around her finances and personal growth
  • Permission to Prosper - Jillian's new ebook and online program

As a writer and coach, Jillian fuses her background in ancestral healing to help women break free of old patterns and self-imposed limitations. She believes that pain is potent medicine, and that we're each assigned a divine soul curriculum that offers us the opportunity to not just survive, but to truly thrive in all areas of life: relationship, career, creativity, and beyond.

Jillian works with women to make space for what really matters, to unearth blockages, and to direct soul desires into manifestation. Her greatest fulfillment comes from witnessing a woman become the powerful Creatrix she is.

Jillian's mission is to make material reality sacred again. She believes that by healing the separation between matter + consciousness all of humanity is uplifted into a higher alignment that can only be described as Heaven on Earth. You can find her work + offerings at www.jillian-anderson.com


Want to win a free 75-minute coaching session with our host?

Rising Women Leaders is running a New Year Giveaway between now and February 11, 2017 for a free 75-minute online coaching session with our host, Meredith Rom.

In this video call we will take the space to reflect on what you want to cultivate for the new year, how you want to show up to take care of yourself, your spiritual practice, and your service and contribution to the world.

Meredith will also answer any questions you have about starting or growing your business, branding, leading workshops, podcasting, finding your voice, or crafting and sharing your story.

To enter, just write us a review on iTunes!

  • Follow  this link
  • Click the blue button on the side bar that says, "View in iTunes"
  • Click "Subscribe" under the Podcast Image then Click "Ratings and Reviews"
  • Click "Write a Review" where you can choose your rating, write your review and click "Submit"(you may be asked to login with your Apple ID)

You can also search for "Rising Women Leaders" in iTunes on your desktop or on the Podcast app on your iPhone to write a review.  

Positive reviews on iTunes will support our community to grow, thrive and reach the women who are seeking the powerful wisdom shared by the ladies featured on this show.

The winner will be announced on the podcast just after February 11! Thank you for participating, Good luck!!

 

023 | Wellness for What Makes Us Women with Denell Nawrocki

 

When I first met Denell Nawrocki, I learned she held a vision of educating and empowering women on alternative methods of birth control, and about gynecological and women's health.

Only months later I saw a string of workshops pop up around our town that Denell put together on Cervical wellness.

I attended her workshop to hear her healing journey - how she cleared her system of HPV and cervical dysplasia, completely naturally. In the workshop she also offered tools for other women who may have received an abnormal pap test at their last women's health exam.

Millions of women in the US alone receive results of an abnormal pap test at least once in their life, yet they are given little information about what they can shift in their lives to alter future test results.

This episode is full with wisdom if you or anyone you know has received an abnormal pap test before, or if you want to learn about preventative health for women's wellness.

I think you'll also be inspired by Denell's story if you feel the call to share your own healing journey and be of service to others as Denell speaks about releasing her fears and vulnerability around using her voice to share her message.

In this episode you'll learn:

  • How our deepest callings are often what scare us most 
  • Denell's personal story of healing naturally from HPV and cervical dysplasia
  • What you can do to take your health into your own hands if you ever receive an abnormal pap test 
  • A 5-step protocol for optimal cervical wellness and health
  • Herbs and self-care routines that are beneficial for women's health
  • How to move from healing yourself to sharing your story and addressing the fears and doubts that come up along the way

Denell Nawrocki is a facilitator, shadow guide, and coach specializing in Women's health and nature connection, an ethnohistorian, and devout follower of Earth's magic and guidance. 

Earning her Masters's degree in Integrative Health Studies from the California Institute of Integral Studies in San Francisco, Denell is passionate about guiding, and empowering women to nurture and honor their unique body experiences. She looks to historical records to learn how Women supported themselves and one-another in the past, and applies these methods to modern times.  

Her organization Generative Health is about becoming informed, aware, and empowered in the magic of being a Woman. Her current work focuses on holding space for women in their gynecological experiences and hosts Cervical Wellness classes and workshops. You can find her and Generative Health on facebook and instagram, on the upcoming Painless Period Summit, or on her website www.generativehealth.org.


Want to win a free 75-minute coaching session with our host?

Rising Women Leaders is running a New Year Giveaway between now and February 11, 2017 for a free 75-minute online coaching session with our host, Meredith Rom.

In this video call we will take the space to reflect on what you want to cultivate for the new year, how you want to show up to take care of yourself, your spiritual practice, and your service and contribution to the world.

Meredith will also answer any questions you have about starting or growing your business, branding, leading workshops, podcasting, finding your voice, or crafting and sharing your story.

To enter, just write us a review on iTunes!

  • Follow  this link
  • Click the blue button on the side bar that says, "View in iTunes"
  • Click "Subscribe" under the Podcast Image then Click "Ratings and Reviews"
  • Click "Write a Review" where you can choose your rating, write your review and click "Submit"(you may be asked to login with your Apple ID)

You can also search for "Rising Women Leaders" in iTunes on your desktop or on the Podcast app on your iPhone to write a review.  

Positive reviews on iTunes will support our community to grow, thrive and reach the women who are seeking the powerful wisdom shared by the ladies featured on this show.

The winner will be announced on the podcast just after February 11! Thank you for participating, Good luck!!

 

022 | The Call of the Goddess with Achintya Devi

 

Subscribe on Itunes here

On the first day of 2016 I took off my clothes and jumped into a freezing cold body of water.

For so long I had avoided cold water, knowing that my body already runs on the cold side and I wanted to do everything I could to stay comfortable.  But on New Year's Day, when I was on a hike with a group of friends and we came upon a gorgeous pond, I just knew I had to do it.  

I felt amazing afterwards. 

But a week ago I went up to Orr Hotsprings with my partner and found myself avoiding the cold plunge at all costs.

I watched as my partner jumped in the icy cold pool on the first night and wondered how he could do it when it was already so cold outside.  Even though I knew I would feel amazing afterwards, I was still avoiding it.

Until one moment I just knew I needed to jump in. It was time to stop procrastinating and just go for it. 

So I did.

And what I noticed as I jumped out was that I could suddenly fully sustain being in the cold air outside.  My body was warming up more quickly from the inside.  

Suddenly I stood a little taller, spread my collarbones a little wider and walked with confidence upon the cool, hard Earth. 

So often in life, we do everything we can to avoid the "cold plunge."  Those things that scare us, those things that feel difficult or challenging.  We procrastinate and put them off...

But the thing is, as soon as we stop avoiding it, we feel bigger and stronger than ever before. 

This is what the past year has been like for me - continuously jumping into a cold pool of water.  It has not always been easy, and at times it has felt like too much...

But as I sat interviewing Achintya Devi for the Rising Women Leaders podcast and hearing her speak of finding the gifts in our challenges and difficulties in life, and how relieved and powerful we feel when we face them head on, I knew it has all been worth it.

Achintya spoke:

"It is the medicine of your pain or fear to walk towards it.  If we keep turning away from it, it's going to keep perpetuating in our lives...and when we can look that challenge in the mirror...and when it is fully felt through the body, something shifts, energetically, in our DNA in our brain structure, in our cells and in our hearts and we understand there is a deeper truth that lies underneath it. "

As we close out 2016, I knew this was the perfect episode to leave you with.

Achintya speaks so powerfully of what is happening in our world right now, how women are being called to embody their divine feminine sovereign power and how we can fully activate and align on our path.

For this episode especially, I urge you to listen all the way to the end.

About three quarters of the way through we touch on some deeply meaningful topics that I think you will want to hear. You may want to have a tissue on hand.

From Achintya:

"We really need you right now...

Every single one of us is completely unique.  There is a grand tapestry being woven right now and each and every one of us has a unique color and frequency... it is going to be incomplete without your thread...

I invite you to trust that your presence matters.  You chose to come to this earth for a reason.  You are holding a particular frequency that is medicine for someone or something..."

And we need you.

In this episode we discuss:

  • Achintya's recent visit with the spiritual teacher Amma
  • Rising above times of darkness and challenge - how to see the gifts in our difficulties
  • The call of the goddess and what is happening at this pivotal time
  • How Achintya left a relationship that was no longer serving her, followed the call of her heart to move to Maui and create her dream business and partnership
  • The advice Achintya has for YOU if you feel the calling of the feminine rising but ever find yourself held back by fear or self-doubt from fully stepping into your power
  • Moon Temple Offerings in 2017! More info here

Tomorrow I will be entering ten days of silence at a Vipassana meditation retreat with my friend Karen.  

I know there may be some challenge and difficulty that arises with meditating for ten hours a day, ten days straight, but I am willing to embrace it to invite a deeper state of peace and equanimity.

 I welcome any good thoughts coming my way (I will be in silence and away from all technology December 20 - 31).

Know that I am wishing you an empowered and loving end of 2016 and I deeply look forward to connecting and sharing more inspiring content with you in the New Year.

With love, 
Meredith


Achintya Devi is the Founder of Goddess Rising, a Global Sisterhood and School of Women’s Wisdom & Moon Mysteries, dedicated to activating and empowering the Wild Sacred Feminine within women worldwide through Moon Priestess Trainings and Leadership Certifications, Wild Sacred Women Retreats, a HerStory Rising Publication and an Online Global Moon Sisters Temple.

As a Women’s Wisdom Guide & Teacher, Ordained Priestess, Wholistic Health Practitioner, Acupressure Therapist and Kundalini Yoga & Meditation Teacher, she is especially passionate about women reclaiming and embodying the rhythm of their Womb Moon Wisdom and rising together in sisterhood to reawaken the collective Feminine Power for lasting transformation within and to serve as Sacred Feminine Leaders in this era of great Planetary Awakening.

Achintya is from British Colombia, teaches and travels internationally and is based on the island of Maui.

www.goddessrising.org

 

Honoring 5 Years with 5 Tips to Thrive in Love & Relationships

 

Five years ago I reconnected with a man I once felt divine love with.  It was at Amma’s ashram in San Ramon, California.  It was just months after I returned from India and was finding my footing living in the Bay Area again.  I went to Amma’s that night, excited to re-immerse myself in the energy of India. 

I had spent the last year and a half in a deep inner transformation, becoming a yoga teacher, attending meditation retreats, visiting spiritual teachers across India, and learning powerful lessons from another experience of love in my life.  When my previous relationship ended, I realized I was okay, having found a deep love within and for myself through my spiritual inquiry.  

I showed up at Amma’s, to pay my respects for all I had learned and to pray for this new phase of my life.  I happened to walk up to the temple at just the exact moment Amma was about to arrive.  Everyone around me was dressed in white, praying and waiting in silence.  

In a moment, a white car pulled up and the door opened for Amma.  She walked through the entrance smiling and waving at people as she walked inside.  Just as she passed, I locked eyes with a familiar face on the other side of the aisle.  

It was a man I had met a year and a half before, before I went to India, before I had become a yoga teacher, before I had done this deep inner work.  His name was Michael.

I met him when I was first living in San Francisco when my housemate, a musician, invited me to join a music-walking tour he was a part of through the Marin Headlands and up to Point Reyes.  The musicians had planned an acoustic folk show for every night along the way and were going to hike on the Pacific Coast Trail and camp between shows.  All the musicians met at the Golden Gate Bridge, where I first met Michael.

But back to that moment at Amma’s, I immediately recognized him and remembered the love I had felt for him long before, standing above the Pacific ocean on the Golden Gate Bridge.  That moment of recognition quickly dissolved as Amma began to speak, guiding the group through a meditation.  Afterwards, I went over to Michael and gave him a hug. 

“You were the first person to tell me about Amma,” he said.  “I spontaneously said yes to an invitation to come here this evening…”

It’s been five years since that night and Michael and I are still together. This past year in particular has brought about huge transformation within myself and within my relationship, so I wanted to honor this milestone by sharing a few of the lessons I’ve learned over the past five years of falling deeper in love…

1. Be Honest and Transparent

Honesty establishes trust. 

I remember attempting to string together lies when I was younger, and it just never ever panned out the way I wanted it to.  I quickly learned honesty was the only answer, and that even if honesty was sometimes hard, I could always find a way to be honest at the same time as being compassionate and loving.

Honesty is about speaking the truth when you are asked, and transparency takes honesty a step further.  Transparency is when you speak the truth even when you are not asked.  Imagine something comes up that involves you and your partner, and you are holding on to feelings or emotions...

Transparency is when you speak up right away and get to the heart of the matter rather than holding it in and keeping it to yourself.

In order to be transparent we need to feel safe.  We need to create a space of non-judgement for our partner and ask that they hold that space for us as well.

An example where Michael and I have found ourselves to be more transparent in the last year, is if one of us feels attraction with someone else.  In the past it felt scary to speak of it, it felt like it needed to be some big secret we could never tell the other, but now, we just name it.  We allow there to be non-judgement.  We bring humor to it.  We remind each other we are human, and we are safe with each other and our experience is completely valid.  

We have even supported each other to explore those attractions, and spend time with the person we feel attraction with.  What I have found in those instances is that attraction does not necessarily need to go in a sexual direction.  Oftentimes there is an attraction when we have medicine and lessons to learn through spending time with that person.  Giving myself permission to explore those attractions has only deepened the love I have for my partner.

I realize now that there is nothing I could share with Michael that would cause me to lose love. 

Finding that sense of security and trust has been so healing.  Holding that space for him has deepened my ability to love unconditionally and provide a space of healing for him as well.

2. Communicate

You know how sometimes you can just tell your partner is upset about something but they are being all quiet about it?  You ask what’s going on, but they just shrug it off as nothing?  You then begin to feel distance, wondering if you did something wrong, unsure of how to re-establish a space of love and connection again?

I’m going to teach you the exercise that has literally saved my relationship, countless times in this exact situation.  It’s called Acknowledgement and Request.  I first learned about it in the book Kindred Spirit by Matthew and Terces Engelhart (some of you may know them as the founders of Cafe Gratitude).

Simply ask, “Is there anything you want to be acknowledged for?”  Allow your partner to speak, and do the best you can to be present and aware in your listening.  When he or she finishes ask, “Is there anything else?” 

Keep asking, “Is there anything else,” while intently listening and doing the best you can to remember each thing.  Now, it’s also important not to react or reply to what your partner is saying.  Simply give them the space to speak and have the floor.  When he or she is complete, lovingly repeat back each and every thing that was said, acknowledging him or her for it. 

When that is complete ask, “Do you have any requests?” Do the same thing - asking, if there is anything else after each request.  When the requests are complete, repeat back each one, sharing that you would like to honor those requests to your best ability.  

Sometimes it makes sense for both partners to have the floor to be acknowledged, and sometimes it makes sense for just one of us. 

Every time I have used this exercise, it has felt like we are starting fresh again with a clean slate.  it has allowed us to create a container of safety and honesty to let go of all the stories and illusions we may have been carrying and fully see each other with love again.  It has helped us to fully let go of and forgive, without the need to hold on to past upsets.  

To have a more in-depth, step by step guide of how this process it works, read my article here.

3. Create Layers of Support

A year ago I had a rude wake up call when my partner was away for two weeks and I realized how much I had been relying on him for support in my life.  

One of my friends Kevin shared, "If you're only relying on one person in your life, it's like you're standing on top of a flagpole.  That's a lot of pressure on one person, especially if his or her life is calling him or her to be elsewhere." 

I imagined myself standing on top of a flagpole, shaky and worried of falling.

He continued, "However, if you become like a spider, with many legs supporting you, it's okay if one of them takes a break.  You still have seven other legs to lean on." 

When you are supported in all directions, your weight is evenly distributed.  It is so much healthier.

I think it's really easy to get swept up in relying on just one person for our emotional, physical and mental needs. However, when we create more structures of support through friendships, therapy, coaching, healers, and especially in community, we can really thrive.

Over the past year, I brought awareness to becoming the spider and creating layers of support so my weight would always be easily distributed.  

This year, when my partner went away for the same retreat for two weeks, I felt infinitely supported. 

My days were full with connection and love.  I realized how much I had transformed over the past year, and how my ability to receive support created a deeper sense of freedom and independence within the relationship.

4. Find Intimacy Outside the Relationship

Are you finding intimacy with yourself?

Do you find intimacy in your friendships? 

Or do you wait to experience intimacy solely in one relationship?

It’s a lot of pressure to expect to receive all the love and intimacy we want in our lives through just one person.  This past year I’ve looked at where I am giving and receiving intimacy in my life and have experimented with deepening intimacy outside of my relationship.

The first place I looked was with myself.  I found when I could experience a deeper sense of intimacy with myself, it always improved the relationship.  This is where my practices of self-love came in - taking long bubble baths, massaging fine oils into my skin, repeating loving affirmations while I brush my teeth, keeping up with my yoga practice and making a delicious and healthy meals for myself, even if I’m eating alone… (For more self-love & self-care tips download my 4-day self-care reset here)

I also began to bring intimacy into my friendships.  I brought gifts.  I asked deeper and more intimate questions.  I shared loving touch, essential oils, sometimes brought flowers or chocolate.  

Finding intimacy outside of the relationship this past year for both of us has deepened the intimacy within our relationship.  

When I am feeling filled up, I am able to be so much more generous and offer that love to my partner.  However, if I show up depleted and expect my partner to give me that feeling of wholeness, it’s just not going to work.

Love is so much about generosity and our ability to give, and it takes us showing up as our best selves in the relationship, not just expecting the relationship to give that to us.

5. Share Appreciation, Everyday

After reading the book, Calling in the One by Katherine Woodward Thomas, I decided to try out one of her exercises of writing a letter to God, or the Universe.  

The idea goes that you write about all your challenges in a letter to God and sign it, “Sincerely, your name.”  Then turn the page and begin a new letter, this time from God to you.  

I tried out this exercise once when I was feeling some challenge in the area of relationship, and one of the things “God” or really, my higher self wrote back to me was to share what I appreciated about Michael with him every day.  

The task immediately took me out of a feeling of lack and brought light to all that was wonderful about this person in my life. 

I don’t think our minds are naturally looking for all the good in our lives and what we appreciate.  It just took a bit of awareness and training in order to switch my mindset around to see and appreciate the people in my life, and really, everything in my life.  

If you are looking to create or call in a thriving relationship, I highly recommend checking out Katherine's book, Calling in the One.

Bonus Tip:  Lead by Example

After speaking with my friend Luna Love about how she attracted the love of her life into her world, I felt inspired to add one more bonus tip for you all.  This is especially helpful for those of you ready to call in partnership in your life, but it also works if you are already in relationship.

Write a list of everything you want in your ideal partnership, and what you’d like your ideal partner to be like.  Then look at that list and ask yourself, “Am I embodying every one of these qualities?” 

Relationships are powerful mirrors, and often what we want to see more of in ourselves is what we say we want to see in our partners. 

However, we can take the pressure off our partner to be someone else by simply becoming that ideal partner we want to attract.  That is when we inspire change in those around us and call in the kind of people we want to be surrounded by.

People don’t change because someone wants them to. People change because they are inspired to...

For more on this topic, check out my other post, 6 Secrets to A Fulfilling Love Life.